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  • Melissa Sims

Improve Your Relationship (with money)

It seems that every time I turn on the tv, there’s another story about the economy. Inflation, rates, how the economy is doing wonderfully (yet it doesn’t feel that way to most of us), and how credit card debt is $1.12 trillion. That’s pretty staggering.

So if the economy is doing so well, why is everyone in so much debt? It is my opinion that people are artificially holding up the economy, using credit to make purchases that they can’t afford with cash on hand, furthering the inflation problem. And that problem leads to other issues, like mental well-being.

Financial wellness is an essential aspect of overall well-being. Let’s be honest, you likely aren’t in home visiting for the money (ha!), so achieving financial stability can seem daunting. This brings me to an interesting caveat when it comes to money. Many of us have been taught that “money is the root of all evil” and lately, that doesn’t seem too far off. It seems like people will do anything - in politics and big business especially - to make more money, leaving morality by the wayside. Adding to the public sentiment is the fact that the distribution of wealth in our world is abysmally off kilter. In the 3rd quarter of 2023, 66.9% of the country’s wealth was held by the top 10%. Adversely, the bottom 50% held a paltry 2.5%.

It seems like a no-win situation for those of us in the lower percentiles. But if we can change our bias about wealth, perhaps we can ignore the noise and focus on our own well-being.  Financial wellness encompasses more than just having enough money to cover expenses. It involves feeling secure about your financial future, having a plan for emergencies, and the ability to make choices that allow you to enjoy life. And, it involves being realistic about what is important to you when it comes to money, and removing judgement from the equation. It’s ok to want big things, as long as we aren’t tying our happiness to those things. A “thing” can’t bring you happiness, only you can do that.

I used to have a very unhealthy relationship with money. I always thought I would never have enough, and even had a little fear wrapped around that idea. What if I couldn’t pay the bills? What if I lose my house? These are big fears, as it has to do with basic needs and security. But a lot of those fears were unfounded. I don’t live beyond my means, and I realized I had these fears from childhood. If you’ve taken any of our workshops around tapping, that is what set me back on track with my relationship with money. Getting my head out of the sand and responsibly dealing with my finances is one of the best things I did for myself. It eliminated so much stress. The statistics vary widely, but financial stress affects anywhere from 72-89% of Americans. Now, I still stress once in a while about money, but my relationship has improved dramatically.

So how can you improve your relationship with money? Mindfulness, the practice of being present and fully engaged in the current moment, can be a powerful tool in managing the stress that comes along with finances. Because mindfulness allows you to live in the present moment, instead of avoiding money problems, you face them head on, and only address with that which you can control, in this moment. This is not to say you ignore the future, but it will lessen the stress load by helping you identify your current financial state and help you plan better for the future.

Financial issues are a significant source of stress for many people. Mindfulness practices such as meditation, deep breathing, and mindful walking can reduce stress levels and help you approach financial challenges with a clearer mind.

As you know, mindfulness encourages you to pay attention to your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. When applied to finances, it helps you become more aware of your spending habits and financial decisions by helping you to:

  • Identify what prompts unnecessary spending. Is it stress, boredom, or social pressure? Understanding these triggers allows you to address the root causes. Try using a financial journal. Keep a journal to track your financial progress and reflect on your financial habits. Writing down your thoughts can help you gain insights and stay committed to your financial goals.

  • Monitor Your Financial Behavior: Regularly check your bank statements and credit card bills. Mindfulness helps you catch any discrepancies early and adjust your spending habits accordingly.

  • Set Intentional Financial Goals: Mindfulness helps you align your financial goals with your values and priorities. This intentionality makes it easier to stay committed to your financial plans.

No one likes to feel out of control, especially with finances. Taking a realistic approach to your current situation will allow you to feel in control and more confident with your financial choices.

A positive mindset is crucial for financial wellness. Mindfulness can help you cultivate a healthy relationship with money by:

  • Practicing Gratitude: Regularly acknowledging what you have can shift your focus from what you lack. This practice can reduce the urge to spend on unnecessary items.

  • Embracing Simplicity: Mindfulness encourages you to find joy in simple, non-materialistic pleasures, reducing the pressure to keep up with consumerism.

  • Developing Resilience: Mindfulness helps build resilience, making it easier to bounce back from financial setbacks and stay motivated towards your goals.

Here are some practical mindfulness strategies that can enhance your financial wellness:

Mindful Budgeting: Create a budget that reflects your values and priorities.

Weekly Check-Ins: Set aside time each week to review your spending and adjust your budget as needed.

Reflect on Purchases: Before making a purchase, pause and ask yourself if it aligns with your financial goals and values.

Mindful Spending

Mindful spending involves making conscious choices about where and how you spend your money:

Pause Before Purchasing: Implement a waiting period for non-essential purchases. This gives you time to consider if the item is truly necessary.

  • Evaluate Necessity: Regularly assess your expenses to identify areas where you can cut back without impacting your quality of life.

  • Practice Minimalism: Focus on purchasing items that add value to your life. Embrace the idea that less is more.

Financial wellness is a journey that requires consistent effort and mindful practices. By integrating mindfulness into your financial routines, you can enhance your financial awareness, reduce stress, and cultivate a positive financial mindset. For home visitors, who often face unique financial challenges, mindfulness can be a powerful tool to achieve financial stability and improve overall well-being. Remember, the key to financial wellness is not just about the numbers but also about maintaining a healthy relationship with money. Start small, stay committed, and watch your financial health flourish.


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